Thursday, June 01, 2006
Well,started out the day badly.Went to college really depressed and all.Couldn't concentrate on my studies.Well,its the 1st of June.After having the worst month of my life,I'm finally glad I can start over.I spent 1 hour crying with my mum today,and my problems are finally solved.
I've actually decided to let go,and not let bitterness,anger and hatred consumed me.My mum is the best.The whole time,she was the 1 who advised me and all.After praying and me crying my heart out,I've finally decided to move on.Well,I guess all I have to do right now is to reconcile the friendship that has been broken.I feel a sense of relieve and all.Don't feel angry or don't feel hatred inside me anymore.
Instead,I feel all better and ready to move on.It'll take time,but I guess it'll heal,slowly...I need to occupy myself with something to do.Today wasn't that bad.I was so down the whole morning,till the guys got punished,thanks to me,haha.So they had to sing a song.And they sang a remix of the National Anthem.It went something like this.
"Its my country,My God damn blood spilled on the floor,
The people live,united and advanced,
The world cup's here,England will beat Brazil,
2 time champions,Brazil down by 10-0,
The world cup's here,England will beat Brazil,
2 time champions,Brazil down by 10-0."
It might not be accurate,as I can't really remember,cause I didn't sing it,as they had the word "God damn" but if you sing it with the 'Negaraku' tune,it sounds really hilarious.Well,after that,I cheered up abit.Decided to go for a movie since the afternoon lecture was cancelled.I finally got to watch "X-men:The Last Stand".It was awesome,though we had to sit 2 rows from the front.Had to slouch and watch the whole show,but at RM6,it was really worth it.Full of action throughout.If you haven't watch yet,I suggest you do so!!
I have watched 3 movies already in about 3 weeks.Poseidon,Over the Hedge,and now X-Men:The Last Stand.All I need to watch now is MI3!!!Probably gonna get the DVD for that.Well,I guess,in the end,its a new start.Forgetting the past and moving on was only a dream,till I let it all out today.I guess,hopefully,during the course of time,I'll be able to finally let go 1 day and move on.
I don't think I have any regrets.Everything happens for a reason.I just gotta learn from my mistakes.Like my mum told me,"All things happen for good to those who love Him." Though its been somewhat of a horrid week for me,but I believe I'll come out of it,stronger then ever.I'll be able to move on 1 day.My mum told me,that its just a trial of life that He has put into my life,He has allowed it to happen for a reason,and I know,that though I can't see why He allowed it to happen to me now,but once I'm out of it,few years from now,I might actually look back and think,"Yeah,now I know why it all happened."
Thus,a new beginning,once again,hopefully will start for me.I guess,now is truly the time,to depend on Him,knowing that,He'll be with me,as I start afresh my life once again.By faith,there's gonna be so many more things to come,good things.And this,is only,the Beginning...
Signing out,
-Matt-
PS:My parents are the best.I would really wanna thank God for them.Thanks so much for being there for me. Without you guys,I would never have made it through.